2011 Playing sports as a Kid

I am starting a hockey league up where I will be playing on sundays for a few months in the summer. When  I was little I was super competitive in sports, it's all I did and all I lived for, I loved playing all kinds of sports and competing to be the best in all of them that I played. I did not carry this enthusiasm into school or like an art, but only outdoors in play. I would gather kids where every I was, and we would play soccer or baseball or whatever the game would be. I have lessened my enthusiasm within competing in sports now, because I realize that I am creating a polarity of being better then another and competition is not real as I would be only competing/abusing myself. I use to get really angry if I lost or did poorly in a game, and would be very proud if I was successful. Allot of energy movement when in these games, the only reason being was to be a winner and boost my ego to show that I am great at something. Allot of it was ego and inferiority/superiority play outs basing myself on the act of winning or losing in sports.

Now when I play sports I have pushed myself and applied myself to let go of the ego, the competition, and the desire to win, and just be here in the physical movement. I noticed I am still worried about others thoughts about me, which I am working to stop, but overall have released this point of desire to be the best. In sports I just am physical and enjoy this movement and expression. When physical in sports you do not think, you just are and move in natural flow, this I find very supportive because it helps and give context to what it is to be a physical being and living here as this, sports as physical movement assists with this well.

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2011 Playing sports as a Kid